Tag Archives: sex and intimacy
A beta male knows nothing higher than himself; but an alpha male instantly recognizes genius.
I’ve had more comments from Five Things Women do in the Presence of an Alpha Male than any article I’ve written so far. Maybe having ‘What is an Alpha man?‘ on my mind turned me into some kind of magnet for them because for the last few weeks I’ve been quite dazzled by the alpha men who keep popping up around me.
Yesterday, at my favorite coffee shop a man who always wants to know what I’m writing asked, ‘What do you think is Alpha?’… I suppose he has to show you, he sort of has to prove he’s better than other guys.’
‘Yes. Maybe it’s true.’ I said, but as I explained that it’s all in the way he proves himself, he interrupted me with his real question: ‘Am I an Alpha man?’ More …
Yesterday I spoke with a couple having intimacy issues.
They were eager to give me the list of wasn’t working.
‘The first thing’ I said ‘you must to drop the habit of beginning with
You will never feel like being intimate
by constantly bringing up what has not worked.
Constant criticism defeats desire. I suggested they spend
the week sharing as many sweet memories as they could.
When I get hooked into the habit of bringing up disappointing things, I first have to notice that I am doing this. When we are asleep to how our unkind words put out the fire of our passion we keep going down this futile tunnel.
The only juice you get from trying to correct your lover by pointing out what went wrong the last time is being ‘right’. Even if you manage to score a point with even tiny insults, you are going to feel alone. We certainly know that insulting our lover is a dead end, but sometimes that perverse habit of criticizing wins the moment, and we say unkind things. Our ego is seems to win the battle, but our hearts always suffer.
It may sound trite to say as many kind things as you can to your lover, but in the realm of intimacy, it’s particularly true. We can retrain our minds to consciously speak of times when things worked well. Make it a habit to recall excellence, beauty and tenderness. Deliberately share victories with your beloved throughout your day. It’s simple, and it works. You just have to do it often enough to put your brain in the proper state of mind to be more loving and kind to each other.
Make it a point to share several beautiful memories and see what happens in the bedroom. I hope you’re pleasantly surprised what flows naturally from your hearts.
Because Beauty is a Living State of Love.
I’m to say that the Art of Erotic Intelligence course is ready to go…
The idea is to inspire you to use your passion to empower every aspect of your life, a core secret of high-performing artists, inventors, business folk and lovers since the beginning of time: energy is energy, but we don’t always understand how to access it.
But if you can tap into and release it in ONE arena of your life, you have the doorway to opening it in EVERY arena of your life.
To be effective, it had to merge male and female energies, and
no matter how balanced I might be, I was always going
to lean heavily on the “female” side. Fortunately, I didn’t have to go looking for someone to do this with. For twenty years, it has been my honor to be
friends with STEVEN BARNES. He’s not only a NYT best-selling author who has written for television and Hollywood movies, he’s also a 4th Degree Blackbelt and Tai Chi and Yoga instructor. Even more than these accomplishments, what I most respect about Steve is his devotion to his son Jason – which I feel adds tremendous power to his masculine perspective.
We’ve had endless conversations and fascinating debates about
how to harness, express, and teach using our erotic intelligence.
We never agreed totally, (or sometimes at all! ) and it suddenly hit
both of us–that lack of total convergence wasn’t a weakness,
it was actually a strength!
We were both sick of teachers who pretend to be in alignment
on every little aspect of their teaching.
The truth is that human beings never agree totally. Heck,
you don’t totally agree with what you thought YESTERDAY!
So we had a unique opportunity, because while we don’t agree
totally, we DO respect each other’s positions. Steve has mastered several disciplines, and has clamoring, devoted students around the world. He is married to the lovely Tananarive Due, a highly acclaimed award winning author in her own right.
I’ve learned something valuable creating this project with Steve, for or one thing, he knows how to be friends with a woman. We decided to try teaching a workshop together, and a little bit of magic happened…
Go see this movie.
Why? Because it’s not only lovely to watch truth crawling through the covers reaching below the belt of collective consciousness, it shows where men and women are not different in the places that count.
While it’s hardly a blockbuster, the fact that ‘The Sessions’ made it to the screen is a testimony to the raw power of sex. And there’s no better way to see such a movie than with a group of women dedicated to compassionate sex and intimacy. So when our Yin Way woman’s class filled a row in the theater, we rooted for this true story of a quadriplegic, virginal 38-year-old writer (John Hawks) and his married sexual surrogate (Helen Hunt).
The story is not only boldly intimate, quirky and touching, Hollywood got the message right: More …
How do you get your lady out of the castle when she won’t say yes?
What if she shuns affection? Avoids sex and rejects you on a regular basis?
The most important key that opens the door to the castle is to be more loving no matter what. For love is the only language she understands.
Why is she rejecting me? More …
The First New Zealand Sexuality and Consciousness
Symposium: Blockhouse Bay Boat Club, March 31-April 1.
Opening Evening: The Temple in Mt Eden, March 29, 7pm
(Quodoushka night, April 2).
There’s a lot of “sharing” here, and it can
mean a lot of things. Normally, sitting in a
circle and summing up how you feel in this
moment. I feel fine — just warming up. Over
organic coffee, the charismatic American
Quodoushaka expert tells me that I might
be an Antelope Woman — just from the way
I talk. “Soften up,” she says. I will.
By evening, I have listened enough. It’s
time to interact. Other conferences might
offer you a golf tournament as a social event
— well, here they have an “intimate night”. It
starts with a big circle. The women outside,
the men inside, move with the music, change
partners. Then gaze into someone’s eyes,
say something nice to a stranger, do a little
twist. A bit like speed dating, but without
trying to impress — just attracting through
radiance and openness. It’s great fun. None
of those micro-connections has to mean
anything. There’s no attachment, no pickup
plan. I notice the handsome man in the
silk kaftan for the first time and just enjoy
that his eyes linger.
The next bit is harder. More …
This is a video poem from my recently released best selling book: ‘The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka’ This clip shows the difference between clinical western approach affects sex, and how the more nature based language of Quodoushka can uplift and inspire more magical sexual experiences.
This is perhaps the Best Love Letter I’ve ever read and you’ll never believe who wrote it.
My Darling Wife
This note is to warn you of a diabolical plot entered into by some of our so called friends – (ha!) calendar makers and even our own children. These and others would have you believe we’ve been married 20 years.
20 minutes maybe – but never 20 years. In the first place it is a known fact that a human cannot sustain the high level of happiness I feel for more than a few minutes – and my happiness keeps increasing.
I will confess to one puzzlement but I’m sure it is just some trick perpetrated by our friends – (Ha again!) I can’t remember ever being without you and I know I was born more than 20 mins ago.
Oh well – that isn’t important. The important thing is I don’t want to be without you for the next 20 years, or 40, or however many there are. I’ve gotten very used to being happy and I love you very much indeed.
Your Husband of 20 something or other.
Signed Ronald Reagan when he was governor of California in 1972. He wrote his note to Nancy on their 20th wedding anniversary.
What’s the Best Love Letter You’ve Ever Read?
The Nectar of Immortality has the flavor of sweet peaches; the scent of rose oil and it causes your heart to swell with the urge to give. When this vapor is in your mind, you let go of worry and it pops the balloons of stress, sorrow and anger stored in your cells. Past transgressions become irrelevant, whatever keeps you from acting kindly dissolves and it gives you power to face anything. More …
Yes! We did it! Our Worldwide request to buy on Amazon Worked! Thank you everyone who bought a copy, bought tons of copies on Amazon, and gifts for friends. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You! From now on, we can say that ‘The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka’ is a Best Seller!. Woo Hoo!
We are #1 Best Selling on Amazon in Shamanism! More …
Join Us September 27, 9am, Phoenix Time for a Live Webinar celebrating the Release of my new book, ‘The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka’- with my guests, Thunder Strikes, Steven Barnes, Kamala Devi, Kristin Viken and Peter Thomas,
It will be worth your time! We will be posting this webinar as soon as it is edited.
Help us Hit #1 on Amazon. Buy a copy on the Magic Day. September 27.
My dear friend, a best-selling author and I were on Skype talking about his recent move away from Hollywood, where he had a booming publishing/movie career. Choosing his beloved family over career is just the kind of man he is, but he’s NOT happy living in Georgia. Because he is a fine specimen, and one of the most brilliant men I know, I know he’ll make it. Yet, for the first time in 10 years, I feel him frustrated and sad.
At the end of our chat I ask Shyena to come over to meet him, and, quite unlike her typical shyness, she saunters up to the screen and then dips towards my friend to reveal a stunning violet brassier. Nothing could have been more perfect. His first encounter with Shyena produces a pure ‘wow’ in his reptilian brain. And ours too.
The reptilian brain is a whole different breed of consciousness. We tap into it through More …
Thank You Richard!
“Amara Charles is the perfect writer to put on paper, in clearly written and illustrated form, the beautiful body of information found in the practices of what is called “Quodoushka”. Having been an active participant in the ceremonies and teachings of these workshops for the past 30 years, I can speak with some authority.
Amara’s book has achieved what we have been waiting for — a concise statement in prose that captures the poetic magick of what is learned and experienced with master teachers during the layered series of Quodoushka sessions . Human sexuality is both very simple and most complex.
In the book, Amara’s skillful use of language clarifies the sexual/spiritual circuity of women and men with deep insight and, thankfully, much delight.” Richard Beck Peacock More …