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An Irresistibly Healing Lover
The most irresistible lovers I’ve ever had were healers. By this I don’t mean we played doctor and nurse (although this is too is fun:-).
When I say healing, I mean exchanging moments (and in some cases days) of extended, rolling, intense states of bliss that changed us both, for healing means to cure something, and to restore a state of natural happiness.
Becoming a healer for someone you adore can certainly be learned by anyone. It happens by letting go into a space where you have the full freedom to safely and totally surrender into pleasure.
Becoming a healing lover also means learning how to feel beautiful (yes, this can be learned) and thus sharing your sexual life force energy as if it were a precious treasure (which it is). To inspire health in someone you adore, first it’s important to consider sexual health as far more than an absence of disease, for your sexual energy, if it is shared wisely, can generate the transformational spaces where all healing occurs.
The path is to increase your own sexual vitality in such a way that you not only wish to share yourself like an overfilled basket ready to pour, you know how to do it well. This is how sexual energy can become the ultimate sweet medicine – both for yourself and your beloved.
But first, how do you recognize sexual health?
A little technical understanding is helpful:
What Erections, the Prostrate and Orgasms Have To do With Your Health
Several signs of prostrate health for men include an abundance of ejaculate, strong erections, semen that has a proper ‘scent’ and the ability to ‘shoot straight.’ Likewise, signs of vitality for women are an abundance of sexual secretions, feelings of arousal and desire, and the ability to have strong orgasms with frequent sexual releases.
However, it’s not enough to know about there things, to really be a healing presence and to have all these functions stay hearty and well, we have to roll up our sleeves, and perhaps our skirts a bit.
What if you knew how to generate such healing sexual pleasure?
I’ll bet many of you have, it just happened spontaneously, which of course is the nature of true healing. Extraordinary states of pleasure however, while they are indeed a gift, do not necessarily have to be rare, once-in-a-life time experiences; they can happen more often if you understand your erotic nature, and know how to entice your lover to play.
The idea is to draw your lover out, like a cobra uncoiling from a prized vase.
Always keep in mind, health is not boring; it’s the ultimate pleasure, for the truth is, sex, (nor anything else for that matter) matters much if we don’t have the energy to enjoy it. The trick is to charge our batteries with expressions of beauty.
Part Two Next Week
D Y E N Discover Your Erotic Nature Intimacy Retreat
July Sedona
Amara Charles is a highly acclaimed sex and intimacy expert who has taught workshops internationally since 1989, helping men and women reconnect with their passion, reclaim their sexual energy and deepen their appreciation for life. Charles is the author of several books, including The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka. Published by Inner Traditions/Bear & CO., it will be available in wide release in August 2011. Charles has been a guest on BBC, ABC radio, and HBO and has spoken at numerous national and international conferences where she gives presentations about sex and intimacy for various groups, corporate clients and universities
A Trivial Affair?
Apparently, trivializing women’s affairs is not that hard to do, and women may wish to pay attention to the mood swing of politicians who are thinly veiling their views against women. They would not be saying these things if they thought it would cost them votes…
Did this State Rep suggest women should buy insurance to plan for rape like an auto policy? I am not making this up.
(the CNN video is no longer available)
Read the Whole article: Abortion debate trivializes rape By CNN’s LZ Granderson: He states:
“Earlier this month, Kansas State Rep. Pete DeGraaf made some rather outlandish comments during a debate centered on banning insurance companies in Kansas from offering abortion coverage as part of their general health plans unless a woman’s life were at risk. The bill, which the governor signed into law last week, would require a woman to carry a separate policy for abortions. When Rep. Barbara Bollier voiced concern for women who may become pregnant as a result of rape or incest, this exchange followed:
DeGraaf: “We do need to plan ahead, don’t we, in life?”
Bollier: “And so women need to plan ahead for issues that they have no control over with pregnancy?”
DeGraaf: “I have a spare tire on my car.”
“I also have life insurance,” he added. “I have a lot of things that I plan ahead for.”
Ladies and gentleman of the great state of Kansas, your tax dollars at work.
Efforts to make women who cant afford their own insurance pay for their own abortions are all attempts to make it extremely difficult for them to choose. In other words, if you can’t make abortions illegal, just make them impossible except for the rich.
Then there’s the argument that many antiabortion folks have: that government should stay out of people’s personal lives (except when it comes to women’s issues). Sure, I agree that taking responsibility and not waiting for welfare handouts is a good thing. But there is a time and place for a government to assist its people. Having decent access to medical care in emergencies or disasters is a place where the collected funds of tax payer money should be used to help people. So is buying insurance for legal surgery. I don’t see why abortions should be exempt from public funding simply because some people do not agree with this law.
In what other instance to people who object to a policy or law get to create funding restrictions to blunt the law? If many people object to a road, a war or weapons sales to certain countries is funding restricted because a lot of people object? It is only with the issue of abortion that a legal operation is restricted; because it involves women.
What’s Wrong with Sex Ed From Porn?
Are Teens getting Sex Ed From Porn?
What’s wrong with this picture?
How long will mainstream jab at the false issues surrounding Sex Ed for Teens? They do get one thing right though, there’s a ton of porn online, and of course teens are going to watch it! Mainstream gets another thing right too; that parents, schools and religious organizations are incapable of providing meaningful sex education because they either can’t or won’t talk about sex in the way teens need to hear it. More …
Is Intimacy Really Sexy?
Is there anything sexier? A warm, soft body waits for you. You notice a smile and a shiver when you enter the room. It’s closeness that melts through anything, dissolves distractions and grabs you near. Sex is an invitation to experience beauty. Intimacy is the knock on the door and the lounging around after. Conversation, listening, loving whatever makes your lover happy- these are the things I love about intimacy. But intimacy is also rugged: it makes you ignore distance, oceans and time. It pulls you close even when you want to pull back. Intimacy is so sexy because it makes you want to More …
White Tigress Sexual Secrets
While western scientists and drug companies are scrambling to unlock the mysteries of – female desire, the sexual teachings of the White Tigress are quietly revolutionizing women’s views on sexuality around the world. One of their quotes from an ancient Chinese Sex Manual states that, ‘If you cannot face directly into your sexuality, you will never discover your true spirituality.”
Propagated in secrecy through small clusters of female Taoists, a rare lineage from ancient China has preserved the secrets of their tradition for hundreds of years. More …
The Art of Energetic Menopause
The Art of Energetic Menopause
Our generation is enjoying the longest life span in history. Yet in order for women to truly enjoy living longer, there are certain things she can do to make sure her later years are as delightful as can be.
For certain female Taoists, many of whom who were admired for their enduring beauty, their goal was to have ‘youthfulness in old age.’ What especially fascinates me is understanding what these women have done do to stay so young and full of energy. The female Taoists I am referring to did not have access to longevity creams or cosmetic surgeries. Their natural rejuvenation methods reveal a highly intelligent and unusual feminine perspective.
According to female Taoists and White Tigresses there are two key things a woman must learn to do to maintain youthful in her body and spirit. First, she must reduce the amount of energy lost during her menstruation.* Secondly, she must cultivate a healthy libido. These are the key ingredients to having a harmonious and energetic menopause. More …
Announcing Our New Affinity Partner Program
Affinity Partner Program- Amara Charles
To celebrate the launch of my forthcoming book, The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka, I am creating a program for friends and colleagues who would like to cross-pollinate with kindred spirits sharing contacts, content and community.
Who is The Affinity Program For?
If you are a leader in your field who would benefit by being introduced to a larger community of people who are likely to love what you do, then it’s for you.
How Will You Benefit?
Some of the program’s features will give you the chance to:
- Expand Your Active Mailing List
- Present Your Services and Materials to New Audiences
- Develop ongoing connections with those Interested in You and Your Work
- Help me Spread the word about my new book The Sexual Practices Of Quodoushka
- Help build a community of kindred spirits, including Educators, Writers, and Artists
- Future Featured Guest Reviews and Interviews on AmaraCharles.com
Our Vision
The vision of the Affinity Partner’s Program is to promote innovative, provocative and transformational leaders who offer educational materials and services for the benefit of humanity. More …
Finding A Man With Heart
It’s easy to get a precious treasure
But hard to find a man with a heart.
from a Chinese Erotic Love Poem
The heart, the mind, the body. These are not separate things. Thus it is not possible to find a man without heart.But you will find many whose hearts are hidden.
The real ‘job’ of a woman (if we must have jobs) is to inspire men to feel their hearts.
When we resist sharing More …
Sexual Taboos: Lying vs Honesty
From Jude - “Good blog and yes I agree about the agreement between you, but it must be that both understand the agreement in the same way. One of the problems here though is that if one of the partners works on developing their sexuality but the other stays in the cozy zone sooner or later something is going to crack. I think its way better if they can explore this stuff together.”
I totally agree that it is more fun to have sexual adventures together! However, I hardly know anyone on the same page when it comes to sex- especially around frequency. Typically, one is curious might be searching for things to do, while the other prefers to stay comfy .
But maybe it’s not actually so. I think in some ways we all want to grow, we just don’t go about it the same. So first, the one who’s more adventurous should lead the way–go try stuff. Go to workshops, read books, talk to friends. Great relationships grow because there’s freedom to look around. Keep in mind that it takes time to figure out your sexual desires. It’s not like you wake up one day and say, I want sex 6 times a week, or I want to be in a threesome (well maybe some of you do.) Start by asking, ‘what on earth do I want?’
For me, what works is giving your partner the permission to take their time to explore the way they want to. If we give each other the space to be explorers, it’s much sweeter when we return.
I think it’s great if we can grow together, but if this kind of intimacy is not happening and you feel stuck, it means something from the past is bothering you. Here’s what you can do: talk about all the past stuff that irks you, write it all on paper and burn it. Past grief, hurt and pain must go, and it doesn’t go just away by itself- you have to make a conscious effort to let it all go. There’s just no way to be sexy if you’re distracted by nonsense from the past. How do I know it’s nonsense? Because it’s over.
One thing I know for sure; sneaking away is not the cure for sexual disappointment. More …
The Taboo of Being Sexually Honest
I recently went to Pamela Madsen’s book reading at Fascinations. If you haven’t seen her book ‘Shameless’ it’s a hoot- a deep hoot. She starts off telling a bit about how her marriage slipped into the all-too-cozy zone. She begins to take all kinds of sex workshops (like the one’s I teach) in order to try and improve her marriage. Then she ventures into the world of sexual practitioners. At first- until she has some sense of what she’s doing- she doesn’t tell her husband.
At the end of her talk she told us about an interview with Dr. Laura Berman who said to Pamela, ‘you know I have an issue with this. I don’t like to make judgments, but I do judge the people you work with.’
In case you don’t know, More …
