Welcome To AmaraCharles.com
Thanks for stopping by. If you’re looking for informative, inspiring, provocative sex and intimacy workshops, articles, books and videos you’re in the right place. Explore My Dalliance page for erotic stories, my Blog in Amara’ World or our For Him/For Her pages for in-depth articles on anything spiritually sexy.
My new book The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka is here! Watch my sneak peak video from Chapter 6 by opting in above.
Order Your copy in our shop and I’ll send you an autographed copy. Plus, you receive several exclusive gifts only available HERE for a limited time.
“This book is a treasure trove of wisdom and sexuality practices from beginner to advanced.”
– Annie Sprinkle, Ph.D.
Author of Dr. Sprinkle’s Spectacular Sex
The Nectar of Immortality
What would just a sprinkle of immortal nectar bring to your relationships? And where do you buy this stuff? What does it taste like and what does it do?
The Nectar of Immortality has the flavor of sweet peaches; the scent of rose oil and it causes your heart to swell with the urge to give. When this vapor is in your mind, you let go of worry and it pops the balloons of stress, sorrow and anger stored in your cells. Past transgressions become irrelevant, whatever keeps you from acting kindly dissolves and it gives you power to face anything.
Make no mistake however, it’s very expensive for it costs all of your attachments to the way anything was or the way you think anything should be.
It’s a celestial gasoline delivered straight from heavenly beings that are rooting for you to feel the perfect harmony of your being. When sprinkled regularly into your daily routine it makes you smile or hum for no particular reason, and it makes obstacles and dramas appear like phantom images floating on a mirror.
Yes, it’s a magic juice; some might call it a divine drug whose source is the living eternal spring of your heart. It’s a magnetic fluid that draws perfection towards you, even if you don’t yet see the perfection. It’s a waterfall of unequaled love you feel wherever everything unreal slides away. It’s the sugar inside tears.
Of course, this Immortal Nectar is a secret kept in plain sight. You are the biggest source of the raw material, the manufacturer, distributor and the consumer all at once. It’s made from various acts of virtue, selflessness, sincerity and generosity. Curiously, even if a person does not realize he or she has been given a dose, the effects are potent anyway.
It’s wise to constantly store this elixir and keep it handy for times when you are tired, lonely or sick. It’s easy to collect, for the main ingredients are loving speech, good thoughts and decisive actions. I suggest having an inner Immortal Nectar cellar where you keep vats of this stuff on hand.
Whenever you feel out of sorts, go into your immortal cellar and put some on your feet so that wherever you walk gets dusted with magic pollen. Pour some on your fingers so your touch becomes soothing. Then drink a few sips until your words are soaked in kindness. And don’t forget to take a huge sniff so the aroma goes straight to your brain and purifies your heart.
I’m writing this on my birthday, so I’m giving away oodles of this stuff for free.
In beauty, Amara
‘Quehestemehah’ (You Dance In My Heart)
Amara’s new book The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka is available in our shop, on Amazon.com and Barnes and Nobel.com
In the Presence of a Master
For the last few weeks I’ve had the remarkable experience of being with Master Angela Yan. Although she does not not call herself a Master, other people do. It’s not only because of her remarkable family heritage or because she trained from highly renown Qigong masters; it’s because of how she lives, what happens and how you feel in her presence.
It is said some masters arouse the fragrance of roses in your mind; with Angela, it’s more like tea and dumplings.
There’s this all-pervading delight dancing on the edge of her gestures, her stories zing you while you’re laughing. She doesn’t really walk, she sort of glides and bounces, and when she lands, it’s like a big tiger nipping at your heels, saying, ‘how do you like the feel of my tongue on your feet’?
Every morning she is in our home I wake up with the same smile I fall asleep with. I feel her grin following me like a bell ringing in my ear all day, saying ‘wake up, wake up, it’s time to wake up!’ Her teachings happen anywhere, in the kitchen, the car or the hallway.
On my way to the bathroom, she says, ‘Smile. Too tense.’
I failed to find a good enough reason to do anything other than hang out with Angela during her stay. On one day, as I attempt to leave, my mind ping pongonging between ‘I’ve got to go to the bank’ and ‘hmmm, how about just one more cup of tea?’, I finally manage to get in my car. I made it all the way to the parking lot when I realize my purse is still lying on the kitchen table; so I turn around to head for home.
I didn’t quite get that message though, so Angela hands me another chance the next day. In the morning, I say, ‘Today, I have an appointment at 1:30 and I am going to leave the house.’ Angela smiles with her peculiar twinkle and says sharply, ‘Why you say that now?’ We are having tea. If you want to go, go. Stop this nonsense.’
I actually did escape for that ‘very important meeting’. But alas, this time I forget my phone only to miss the text message saying, ‘Caught in traffic, can we reschedule?’. Driving back home again, I laugh at my folly and my tendency to squirm away from things that are good.
The truth is, I don’t want to miss one of her stories, I don’t want to miss the faces after their sessions with Angela. I want to serve tea, I want to be in my home and in my body
and I like laughing this much, because I feel light, peaceful and happy.
I am beginning to understand why Angela calls herself a ‘life scientist.’ Her Qigong noodle dishes, with ginger, bacon, sugar and greens are as superb as her healing sessions. Each conversation, each cup of tea is precious and full. We talk about the way people eat concepts instead of food. Between mouth fulls of toast, she tells us about a doctor who mixes up his own x-ray with a patients’. The doctor dies six months later, convinced he has cancer, while the patient, upon seeing his perfectly fine x-ray returns to health.
Living, cooking, teaching, and sharing stories this way helps us grow as human beings together. I remember one morning tea when Angela wept over a grave mistake she once made. ‘I don’t know why I cry every time I think of this’ she says, still repenting with deeply felt tears.
Vulnerabilities spin through the net of her life as she continuously preens and cleans her wisdom through chants and prayer. For Angela Yan, nudging, prodding, sometimes jolting, sometimes delighting people towards Dharma is simply what she does.
These are photos of the Qigong workshop and a few of the people
who came by for Angela’s Healing Clinic.
p.s. She will be back!!!
In beauty, Amara Charles
My book, The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka is available on Amazon, Barnes and Nobel or visit our shop for Special Holiday Bundles
Announcing Our New Women’s Retreat
Voices of the Divine Feminine – New Zealand Women’s Retreat
March 22-26
Sing. Pray. Love.
Travel to the enchanting ‘Land of the Long White Cloud‘, New Zealand, for our special Women’s Retreat where we will delve deeply into the mystery of our Divine Feminine Nature. In the exquisite sanctuary of the Mana Retreat Center we will nourish, heal and rejuvenate our bodies, minds and souls. Together, we will embody the beauty and grace of our natural feminine power.
Find Your Voice
Through ancient matriarchal teachings that explain how you can use the cyclical flow of your feminine fluidity, you will untangle blockages and learn to access the reservoir of your hidden resources. Through chanting, meditation and feminine spiritual practices, we will invoke our true voices so we can listen, clarify and strengthen our path with heart.
Join Amara Charles, Shyena Venice and special guest Sharman Okan for a delightful journey you will never forget. Enjoy the spirit of this gorgeous land as well as premier accommodations, spa treatments, fine food and remarkably friendly people. If you have always wanted to visit New Zealand, or long to bathe in the tranquility of your feminine beauty, this is the way to do it.
This Voices of the Divine Feminine Retreat has come about through many years of dreaming together with Sharman Okan, and a number of elegant adventures with Shyena to New Zealand. We did our first and only retreat together many years ago in Wirunii, Australia. It was called Mystic Rapture, which is precisely what it was. It was a fully spontaneous event where we co created from our different traditions from the deep affinity of our spirits. It was a full immersion into feminine ceremonies of initiation from the Shamanic, Taoist, Tantric and Buddhist lineages we carry. Voices of the Divine Feminine will thus be a reunion continuing what we began seven years ago. It’s going to be a sublime experience of ceremonial chant, meditation, deep reflection and joy opening the space to discover the true vibrations of your natural voice.
YOUR FACILITATORS
AMARA CHARLES is a Master Quodoushka Teacher and has been an apprentice of the Sweet Medicine SunDance Path of Turtle Island since 1987. She has traveled teaching Spiritual Sexuality workshops internationally for over twenty years. She is the author of the best selling book ‘The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka’ as well as ‘Sexual Agreements’’, ‘Aching to Open’ and ‘Touch for Two’ Amara welcomes you to find your voice at the her Voices of the Divine Feminine Retreat in New Zealand.
www.amaracharles.com
SHYENA VENICE Golden Eagle is an intuitive spiritual healer and teacher. Master Bodyworker and gifted musician, Her teachings are based on 20 years of practice in the ancient Taoist White Tigress and Shamanic traditions of spiritual sexuality. She is also the Musical Director of Touch for Two’ and CEO of SYLK, the Natural Premium Lubricant for women.
www.shyenavenice.com
SPECIAL GUEST: Sharman Okan (Swami Shishyananda Saraswati), has been chanting for 35 years. She lived as a sannyasin in a yoga ashram for twelve years where she learned to chant sacred mantras as a path to healing, enlightenment and ecstasy.
View The Mana Retreat Center, New Zealand
FOR THOSE INTERESTED IN ATTENDING
Register Now for Early Registration Discount
Payment Explanation
Early Registration Discount
The cost of the Retreat, including meals and lodging at the Mana Retreat Center is $1595. You can receive the Early Registration Discount of $1395 if you pay in full now. You can also send us a $300 deposit by January 15st and pay the balance by February 1st.
You can pay the full amount of $1395 USD or the $300 Deposit by Paypal, cash, credit card or Check to Nourishing Arts. 3741 East Shangri La Road, Phoenix, Arizona.
Early Payment Schedule Summary
Now until January 15: $300 USD deposit. Due by February 1st: $1095 USD.
Extended Payment Plan $1595
Extended Payment Schedule Summary
Jan 15: $300 USD
Feb 15: $350 USD
March 1: $350 USD
March 15: $350 USD
March 22 (first day of workshop) $245
All payments complete by March 22
We accept Pay Pal, Cash, Credit Card or Checks to: Nourishing Arts 3741 East Shangri La Road
Thanks for your interest to join us for what promises to be an extraordinary spiritual experience in New Zealand. Our Women’s Retreat will be in the exquisite sanctuary of the Mana Retreat Center in the Coromandel.
Payments
Early Registration Discount
The cost of the Retreat, including meals and lodging at the Mana Retreat Center is $1595. You can receive the Early Registration Discount of $1395 if you pay in full now. You can also send us a $300 deposit by January 15st and pay the balance by February 1st.
You can pay the full amount of $1395 USD or the $300 Deposit by Paypal, cash, credit card or Check to Nourishing Arts. 3741 East Shangri La Road, Phoenix, Arizona.
Early Payment Schedule Summary
Now until January 15: $300 USD deposit. Due by February 1st: $1095 USD.
Regular Extended Payment Plan $1595
Early Payment Schedule Summary
Jan 15: $300 USD
Feb 15: $350 USD
March 1: $350 USD
March 15: $350 USD March 22 (first day of workshop) $245
All payments complete by March 22
We accept Pay Pal, Cash, Credit Card or Checks to: Nourishing Arts 3741 East Shangri La Road
Travel Information: Contact Shyena at Shyena@amaracharles.com for full details of what you will need to attend.
Location: Mana Retreat Center www.manaretreat.com
Ph: + 64 7 8668972 Fax: + 64 7 8668214
Coromandel, New Zealand
Mana is situated 20 minutes south of Coromandel Town, a two-hour drive from Auckland or Hamilton. From Thames take Hwy 25 toward Coromandel. After about 30 mins on the coast road you will come to Wilson Bay after which the highway turns inland and uphill. After a short dip the road rises again to Manaia Summit and Rest Area. From here proceed 2 kms downhill looking for the sign on the right “Mana Retreat 300m”. Turn right into the drive. It will be autumn in New Zealand. The weather is likely to be in the 50’s to 70’s during the day and in the 40’s at night.
Plan to arrive at least 2 days ahead of the start of the workshop due to jet lag. The time zone is 19 hours ahead of Arizona time. So that we can best assist everyone, please send your itinerary with arrival times, including where you are travelling from and where you plan to stay, by the week prior to the workshop. The airport is in Auckland and there are many hotels to choose from there.
The workshop will start at 4 pm on Thursday, March 22. Plan to arrive at the Retreat Center between noon and 3 pm. We will break for dinner at about 6 pm and then resume in the evening.
A Lover, a Friend a Teacher
It is said, the most important thing you can accomplish in life is to find a true teacher. Friends may come and go as do lovers, but the words of your teacher – if they are guiding you well – will resonate in your heart until your last breath.
Finding friends to enjoy life’s journey or
lovers who can travel with you into the intimate realms is one thing; finding a teacher is something entirely different, for a true teacher has only one thing in mind; your enlightenment.
In the Sweet Medicine tradition the name for a spiritual teacher is weihas. It means ‘one who has walked before.’ While we can all be teachers for others in our areas of excellence, our greatest teachers cause us to drop delusions we are not able to see. A great teacher is filled with powerful love, but is in not the kind of love that includes sex, nor is it like love between friends. It’s not like the love of a mother or father who is entwined with your survival. A great teacher may even desert you until you realize the depth of your attachments.
We tend to overlook or amplify flaws in our friends, and get tangled in the foibles of our lovers. Yet we usually try to make our teachers into pristine idols. We want them to be better than human. The trouble is, the gods we project onto our teachers are made in our own image, and our beliefs convince us he or she should eat like this, must never get angry, or ought to behave in certain ways. A great teacher will defy these notions.
The questions is, if you are inspired by a teacher and sense that he or she can show you a way to cultivate yourself, then do whatever you can to learn. Practice the things they show you. This is the meaning of sincerity, and it is the most important virtue a student can possess.
With friends and lovers, we seek things like company, intimacy, comfort and affection, but we must be very careful about what we seek in a teacher, because it’s different.
The Road to Finding a Teacher
In my experience, being near your teacher is like sitting next to a ticking clock. At any moment the alarm bell might go off. The second you stray, lose awareness, become greedy, self centered etc. it’s the teacher’s job to remind you to quit coasting. Kung Fu Panda may seem like a silly movie, but it’s true; you feel like a rolly-polly numbskull, and usually, you are. Those who think they are better than their teacher should find a new one.
If you hear a familiar voice in the middle of the night nudging you to reflect on what you are doing, it may be the sound of your teacher budding like a lotus opening inside you. While this sound may never satisfy you like the moans of a lover, if you can decipher it’s message, it will guide you in the right direction.
Feature Article: Why I Wrote the Book
I believe happiness in our intimate life can change the world – one relationship at a time. I also believe sexual intimacy is the most challenging part of any relationship.
I wrote this book because I know great intimate relationships don’t just ‘happen’. Those who share emotional trust, who help bring each others’ dreams into reality and who enjoy sexual intimacy work to have these things.
I wrote this book because I believe such skills, especially the skill of balancing intimacy and sex with everything else in your life can and must be learned. I love the Quodoushka teachings, because everyone is included, anyone can share them and, once you get a taste of just how much there is to learn, everything in your relationships gets better.
No one I know lives, toils or dreams of success all by themselves. We all want to generate abundance for one purpose: to share it. What’s the use of all our efforts if we’re not creating the kind of intimate relationships where we can’t wait to go home and share?
We Hit #1 Best Seller on Amazon!
Yes! We did it! Our Worldwide request to buy on Amazon Worked! Thank you everyone who bought a copy, bought tons of copies on Amazon, and gifts for friends. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You! From now on, we can say that ‘The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka’ is a Best Seller!. Woo Hoo!
We are #1 Best Selling on Amazon in Shamanism! More …
Reviews for ‘The sexual Practices of Quodoushka’ are Coming In
Thank You Richard!
“Amara Charles is the perfect writer to put on paper, in clearly written and illustrated form, the beautiful body of information found in the practices of what is called “Quodoushka”. Having been an active participant in the ceremonies and teachings of these workshops for the past 30 years, I can speak with some authority.
Amara’s book has achieved what we have been waiting for — a concise statement in prose that captures the poetic magick of what is learned and experienced with master teachers during the layered series of Quodoushka sessions . Human sexuality is both very simple and most complex.
In the book, Amara’s skillful use of language clarifies the sexual/spiritual circuity of women and men with deep insight and, thankfully, much delight.” Richard Beck Peacock More …
My First Quodoushka Book Signing in Asheville!
My Dream has come true!
Many years ago, when I was roaming the Strand Book store in NYC (which still smelled like books), I said to myself,
‘Someday, my book is gonna be on ‘the shelf.’
25 years later, it has happened. It’s still sinking in. And yes, it feels as good as I dreamed it would.
Seeing my book on the shelf (next to the Kama Sutra, no less), is as sweet as sweet can be. I hope people will enjoy reading it.
Then I got to talk and sign books. What a blast!
Talking about sex on a Monday night, with kids roaming about, people drinking coffee, and more than a few fellow book lovers listening in… what could be better?
Support local Book Stores!
Malaprop’s is the quintessential independent book store. It’s cozy, warm and big, and it’s in the heart of funky, upscale Asheville, North Carolina.
(there’s rocking chairs in the NC airports instead of benches. Seriously. )
You can get lost in the aisles, pulled by rows and rows of books, and of course, there’s some rather fair and shiny, down-home folk strolling about.
I ask, ’how many of you have been to a book reading at Malaprop’s before?’ They ALL raise their hands. Most come to the store to hear authors regularly. Nice. Not many places like this left. (BTW, if you know of a great Independent book store where you live, I’d love to come by.)
Signing books was fun, because it’s still the personal connections we make that really touch us. There were women and men in their seventies, and several young guys in their 20′s (I do like this), with every age in between. The questions were intelligent, as you would expect in a book store…
Yes, there were some raised eyebrows, and you could feel people swallowing tightly, at times, but, (and maybe it’s the Southern hospitality,) they were more than polite. They seemed quite open to my message that our sexuality is natural, healthy and good.
I love introducing the idea of spiritual sexuality to new, curious folk. They wonder what it is. Rightly so.
The Best Part
The Sexual Anatomy Types certainly gets their attention, especially the way I talk about it– just on the edge of acceptable conversation. Right on the edge, actually.
Virginia, who takes care of guest authors who come to speak, bless her heart, had a grin from ear to ear the whole time. Virginia, you, and Asheville rock.
Thanks for having me.
p.s. Help me Hit #1 on Amazon on September 27th.
Buy a copy of ‘The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka’ on September 27th on Amazon.com.
p.p.s. No, it wont be signed… BUT, being highly ranked on Amazon means a great deal to the books longevity and worldwide availability.
Are You a Pit Bull Man or An Antelope Woman?
Find Your Sex Type @ IGNITE PHOENIX #IPAH
Do We Fit?
I Rocked the House @ Ignite Phoenix Afterhours with: Find Your Sex Type from my new book : ‘The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka.’
Anything goes at the Axis Club with Ignite…. Best Part: after the show everyone wanted to know their Sex Type. Some rather Interesting conversations… I’m talking to men asking their ladies to confirm the length and thickness of their members. To total strangers! And they were loving it!
One woman, when I say she’s a Fox Woman and that her bf is Deer Man (after a bit of description) she asks, ‘Does a Fox ‘fit’ with a ‘Deer?’
I saw them later sauntering away to their car, looking like the night was going to be good… Oh Boy, the book isn’t even out yet (soon… soon!) and wow, this is already a blast.
The Gift of Orgasm
Ignite Phoenix is awesome.
You get 5 Minutes, 20 Slides and they say: ‘Enlighten us, but make it fast.’
What a rush it is to get up there. I’m gonna do that again. In fact, they’re taking submissions now for the next one in October and I hear they have Ignites in different cities all over.
Laura Orsini, my publicist tells me that the bar tenders stopped pouring to find out what a’ Buffalo Woman‘ is during my slide show.
And Shyena told me there was a gasp from the ladies when I put up the 9 Pussy Types slide… I didn’t mean to create a gasp tho… you see, I find these pics utterly beautiful, but I guess I’m used to them…
Bringing down the House with Beauty
The other thing I loved: This is NOT my usual audience. I mean, these people (and a lot of them were in their 20′s tweeting away) maybe have heard of the word ‘Tantra’ but have NO idea what it is. So I LOVE to bring the Quodoushka teachings to people who have never heard anyone say: ‘Your Sexuality if Sacred, Healthy and Good.’
So, lets drop all the guilt, blame and shame around sex, and enjoy it for the gift it is.
Aho!
Finding Belinda Duffy: An Awesome Web Designer
The Making of the Amara Charles Website
The Story Behind Our Website
I will not say it was an easy process, nor that I liked every bit of creating this new site, but I will say, I am absolutely thrilled by the possibilities of what this baby can do.
The best part? Finally, women-friendly technology! I get to change my mind a hundred times a day. (I am so happy). YAY wordpress.
Choosing Belinda Duffy
Okay, choosing a web designer is not marriage, but it’s close. Finding the one to hold (or pull) your hand through the daunting downloads of information and decisions has to be done with the right kind of person. More …
Hot and sexy, Grandmother?
Hot and sexy, Grandmother?
After a 6-week jaunt of long, hard and probably overly picky revisions, I finally pressed SEND. The manuscript for my new book on Quodoushka* is in the publishers hands! If the last few days of this rather grueling process are any indication of its power, we are in for a magical ride.
For anyone who has been to a Quodoushka, (or has spent 4 days in a spectacular sexuality workshop filled with loving kindness and profoundly healing fun) you know what it feels like to go shopping a few days later. People come up to ask you where you’ve been because there’s this lingering radiance shimmering around you. More …
How To Spot a Real Woman
How To Spot a Real Woman
A real woman is easy to spot. She stands out like a tall flower raising above a field of poppies- not because she’s trying – quite the opposite- she draws your eyes towards her because there is something mysteriously different about the way she moves through the world. True, they are rare, but once you know what to look for, a real woman is impossible to miss.
How do you spot her? Ah, to get close enough to taste her secrets, you must develop senses that can see her signals. Her gestures are alluring, but not in the way you may think. Her beauty is subtle. It is not a surface quality that fades with age nor is her elegance dependent on artifice to maintain. A real woman is natural- she is nature. This is what makes her shine with an unmistakable magnetic glow.
Ever Wonder Why She Sometimes Avoids Sensuous Touch?
I just watched Brene Brown’s Ted’s lecture on Vulnerability, Connection, Shame and Self Worth. First of all, she’s a lovely, humble speaker who has done some great research on what makes people shy away from intimate connection. Didn’t know you could get PHD’s on that kind of research… Her bottom line take on what makes people feel disconnected and alone? Feeling Unworthy.
After teaching spiritual sexuality workshops for over twenty years, I couldn’t agree more. And here’s what else I think. More …
Six Words for Intimacy
The beauty of Intimate Touch
Touch is the heart of intimacy. Depriving our selves of loving touch is one of the biggest mistakes we can make, because without touching and being touched, everyday stress sky rockets and the mind gets foggy.
Approaching your lover with intimate heartfelt gestures, spontaneously giving your warm and tender embraces may be the single most important thing you can do to sustain a loving relationship.
Today, my six word for Intimacy are:
Feeling Intimate Moments One by One
What are your 6 words for Intimacy?
In beauty, Amara
If you like this post pass it on.
Our Next Touch for Two Live Couple’s Night is March 25 in Phoenix. Register in our shop or get the Touch for Two video for your pleasure at home.
Share your 6 words for intimacy in the Comments section below.
Is Intimacy Really Sexy?
Is there anything sexier? A warm, soft body waits for you. You notice a smile and a shiver when you enter the room. It’s closeness that melts through anything, dissolves distractions and grabs you near. Sex is an invitation to experience beauty. Intimacy is the knock on the door and the lounging around after. Conversation, listening, loving whatever makes your lover happy- these are the things I love about intimacy. But intimacy is also rugged: it makes you ignore distance, oceans and time. It pulls you close even when you want to pull back. Intimacy is so sexy because it makes you want to More …
The Taboo of Being Sexually Honest
I recently went to Pamela Madsen’s book reading at Fascinations. If you haven’t seen her book ‘Shameless’ it’s a hoot- a deep hoot. She starts off telling a bit about how her marriage slipped into the all-too-cozy zone. She begins to take all kinds of sex workshops (like the one’s I teach) in order to try and improve her marriage. Then she ventures into the world of sexual practitioners. At first- until she has some sense of what she’s doing- she doesn’t tell her husband.
At the end of her talk she told us about an interview with Dr. Laura Berman who said to Pamela, ‘you know I have an issue with this. I don’t like to make judgments, but I do judge the people you work with.’
In case you don’t know, More …
Can Casual ‘Hookups’ Be Intimate?
In an article by Brenda Wilson called Sex Without Intimacy: No Dating, No Relationships the author wonders how the trend of ‘hooking up’ for sex effects our meeting and mating rituals: Hooking up started before the Internet and social networks, but the technology is extending the lifestyle way beyond the campus. Deborah Roffman says no one is offering this generation guidance on how to manage what is essentially a new stage in life.
The dilemma for this generation is how to learn about intimacy, she says: “How am I going to have a series of relationships that are going to be healthy for me and others, and going to prepare me for settling down with one person?”
I believe you can develop the qualities you need for long-term, committed relationships, while ‘hooking up’ or what I call free dancing. You can be honest about your intentions; you can practice care, respect and generosity, even and especially when sex is involved.
You can be honest about your intentions; you can practice care, respect and generosity even, and especially when sex is involved. More …
How to Talk Less and Have More Sex
I think maybe we all want sex that makes us shiver and sweat all over, but we also want sex that makes us smile, and melt into each others bodies all night. Do we have to choose between hot sex or intimate sex? While some talking is needed to have either how sex or cozy sex, it’s good to know when to talk and when to stop.
Here’s one of my favorite ways to hit the sweet spot. More …
What’s So Sexy About Dirty Talk?
Even though I don’t really think dirty talk is ‘dirty’ at all, I must admit I like both giving and getting it. I like the prelude, the spoken and unspoken words, the whole courtship of erotic conversation. It’s fascinating how changing just a few words, and the tone of your voice can turn luke warm ho hum sex into peel me off the moon kind of sex.
Which of these words would melt you to the ground? While the Vanilla lines may work just fine, try the Hot ones once in a while to put some fire to your heart, and maybe a few other places too.*
Are You Vanilla or Hot? More …
Can Sexual Agreements Expand Monogamy?
I wrote about Sexual Agreements in
response to Pamela Madsen , author of ‘Shameless‘ from her Blog in Psychology Today:
I like the term Expanded Monogamy because these words suggest that you can be committed and faithful to the one you love and still create the freedom to explore safely and with agreed upon boundaries.
The question is, how on earth do we do this? More …
How Chakras Enhance Sex and Intimacy
What can chakras tell you about your sex life? Well, the truth is you’ll live just fine, and you can have great sex even if you’ve never heard of a chakra. However, when you find out that that low energy, lack of desire and low libido has a lot to do with sluggish chakras, the subject gets a lot more interesting.
It gets even more interesting More …
How To Have More Erotic Fun In Bed
Would You Like to Invite Eros Into Your Bedroom and Have More Erotic Fun? Have you ever had a particularly erotic evening and said to you your self afterward “Wow, that was amazing – it was like, perfect.” More …
Finding A Man With Heart
It’s easy to get a precious treasure
But hard to find a man with a heart.
from a Chinese Erotic Love Poem
The heart, the mind, the body. These are not separate things. Thus it is not possible to find a man without heart.But you will find many whose hearts are hidden.
The real ‘job’ of a woman (if we must have jobs) is to inspire men to feel their hearts.
When we resist sharing More …
Great Teen-Sex Education
Creating Exceptional Teen-Sex Education
Listen to My Interview with Laurie Handlers on the Sex and Happiness Radio. More …
Ready for An Intimate Break Through?
Featuring a blend of Taoist White Tigress and Shamanic sexuality experiences in nature to enhance your pleasure, orgasms and intimacy. (For full description, see below)
The first D Y E N Retreat is July 21-24 at Grace Grove Retreat Center, 20 Minutes South of Sedona.
Discover Your Erotic Nature
If you are committed to having extraordinary relationships, and would to bring new possibilities into your life, then this retreat may be for you.
Our new sex and intimacy rejuvenation retreat will immerse you in what matters most to you.
It is said that nature is our greatest teacher.This is why I am bringing my experience of over 20 years of helping people discover the beauty and power of their erotic nature into the land of Sedona.
Drawn from my Quodoushka and White Tigress Taoist sexual experiences, this retreat is the first presentation of the blend of these remarkably healing and rejuvenating sexual practices.
Discover Your Erotic Nature
Because the core of these traditions is rooted in developing reverence, respect and understanding the natural energies of sex, a big part of this intimacy retreat wil include adventures in nature – showing you how you can use the essence of nature to enhance your erotic pleasure.
What the D Y E N Retreat will Include:
- Discovering Your Unique Erotic Type. You will discover what kind of lover you are, and what kind of pleasure really works for YOU (and your lover).
- Teachings and Experiencing Yin – Yang Sexual Harmony. Learn ways to to balance your Feminine (yin) with your Masculine (yang) energy so you can both give and receive in beauty.
- Adventures in Nature to Enhance Your Intimate Pleasure. Celebrate the elements of Creation- the Water,Wind, Earth and Fire to greatly enhance your erotic feelings of connection.
- Sexual Exercises for Health and Longevity from the White Tigress Taoist Tradition. These easy exercises will not only boost your vitality, they will inspire you to enjoy intense intimate pleasure.
- Time to Relax. I know that one of the biggest obstacles to enjoying the quality of intimacy you desire is time. Well, if you’re looking for the right time, this retreat is for you.
This retreat is for those who wish to enjoy learning, growing and sharing intimate moments in a relaxed, nourishing environment. We understand that taking time to be together, having fun, and being stimulated by new possibilities is probably the reason you are considering a sex and intimacy retreat.
That’s why we’d love you to join us for a profoundly provocative intimate adventure, where you can unwind, uplift and inspire a new level of intimate sexual pleasure together.
When, Where and How Much? More …
Hilarious Birds and Bee’s –And Then Some
I’m joining a panel on Teen Sex Ed at the Sedona Conference in April. It should be a frisky conversation, with Reid Mihalko, Laurie Handlers, Leela Sullivan and other guests.
So, when I came across this video on the Birds and Bees, just had to watch. Julia Sweeney’s sex talk with her daughter is utterly hilarious. I love the way her daughter Mula reasons her way through the most natural questions in the world. She just cant help the insatiable curiosity of her 8 year old mind, and thankfully, her Mom stays in the saddle, holds on and does the best she can!
It’s wonderful to see Julia squirm,teetering between ‘way too much information’, and figuring out to get through her daughters questions. Watch this video to see a great way to handle the spontaneous, irrepressible need to know questions about sex. I love it because it’s not perfect, prescribed or planned-
Gotta Watch
Amara Charles’ book The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka
is available on Amazon.
Amara Charles on BOOTY DOCTORS BLOGTALK RADIO
Amara Charles On BOOTY DOCTORS BLOGTALK RADIO.com
Nine Erogenous Zones of The Love Game
Twas a fabulous conversation! For Him: on how to erotically arouse and court a woman
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/thebootydoctors
TO LISTEN TO Amara & the BOOTY DOCTORS ON BLOG TALK RADIO More …
The Elements of All Abundance
Crystal Sun Kiva
As life bestows blessings or delivers punishing blows, how can musing on each element of creation for several dawns and dusks, watching spiders and ants, clouds and the moon reveal the secrets of abundance? Surrendering to the splendors of Mother Life, I see how to ward off misfortune with patience. Feeling the relentless wind, the gush of currents, the fire in the stars, I hear Nature’s urgent call to give unreasonable beauty, kindness and wisdom for the benefit of others.
The Four Corners of Abundance More …
What’s Wrong with Sex Ed From Porn?
Are Teens getting Sex Ed From Porn?
What’s wrong with this picture?
How long will mainstream jab at the false issues surrounding Sex Ed for Teens? They do get one thing right though, there’s a ton of porn online, and of course teens are going to watch it! Mainstream gets another thing right too; that parents, schools and religious organizations are incapable of providing meaningful sex education because they either can’t or won’t talk about sex in the way teens need to hear it. More …
An Irresistibly Healing Lover
The most irresistible lovers I’ve ever had were healers. By this I don’t mean we played doctor and nurse (although this is too is fun:-).
When I say healing, I mean exchanging moments (and in some cases days) of extended, rolling, intense states of bliss that changed us both, for healing means to cure something, and to restore a state of natural happiness.
Becoming a healer for someone you adore can certainly be learned by anyone. It happens by letting go into a space where you have the full freedom to safely and totally surrender into pleasure.
Becoming a healing lover also means learning how to feel beautiful (yes, this can be learned) and thus sharing your sexual life force energy as if it were a precious treasure (which it is). To inspire health in someone you adore, first it’s important to consider sexual health as far more than an absence of disease, for your sexual energy, if it is shared wisely, can generate the transformational spaces where all healing occurs.
The path is to increase your own sexual vitality in such a way that you not only wish to share yourself like an overfilled basket ready to pour, you know how to do it well. This is how sexual energy can become the ultimate sweet medicine – both for yourself and your beloved.
But first, how do you recognize sexual health?
A little technical understanding is helpful:
What Erections, the Prostrate and Orgasms Have To do With Your Health
Several signs of prostrate health for men include an abundance of ejaculate, strong erections, semen that has a proper ‘scent’ and the ability to ‘shoot straight.’ Likewise, signs of vitality for women are an abundance of sexual secretions, feelings of arousal and desire, and the ability to have strong orgasms with frequent sexual releases.
However, it’s not enough to know about there things, to really be a healing presence and to have all these functions stay hearty and well, we have to roll up our sleeves, and perhaps our skirts a bit.
What if you knew how to generate such healing sexual pleasure?
I’ll bet many of you have, it just happened spontaneously, which of course is the nature of true healing. Extraordinary states of pleasure however, while they are indeed a gift, do not necessarily have to be rare, once-in-a-life time experiences; they can happen more often if you understand your erotic nature, and know how to entice your lover to play.
The idea is to draw your lover out, like a cobra uncoiling from a prized vase.
Always keep in mind, health is not boring; it’s the ultimate pleasure, for the truth is, sex, (nor anything else for that matter) matters much if we don’t have the energy to enjoy it. The trick is to charge our batteries with expressions of beauty.
Part Two Next Week
D Y E N Discover Your Erotic Nature Intimacy Retreat
July Sedona
Amara Charles is a highly acclaimed sex and intimacy expert who has taught workshops internationally since 1989, helping men and women reconnect with their passion, reclaim their sexual energy and deepen their appreciation for life. Charles is the author of several books, including The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka. Published by Inner Traditions/Bear & CO., it will be available in wide release in August 2011. Charles has been a guest on BBC, ABC radio, and HBO and has spoken at numerous national and international conferences where she gives presentations about sex and intimacy for various groups, corporate clients and universities
Feature Article: The Erotic Diamond Mind
Dedicated to Razel Wolf and the Next Generation of Bodhisattvas
Returning from a sublime time, sharing ceremony with exquisite people who gathered from around the world to celebrate the raw power beauty of being alive. On the last day, as our prayers for the healing of Grandmother Earth and all her people began, our beloved Dance Chief Elder shared a vision she had of many Bodhisattvas floating in our midst. Each Deity was encased in a diamond. Earlier, the two people sitting by her side saw something shiny hiding deep in the red dirt by her feet. Needless to say, we all shivered in the early morning sun to hear that a Herkimer diamond was dug out and lifted from the sand, in front of where she sat. It is impossible to express the feeling of utter joy when such things happen. Clearly, it was a testimony of raw power manifestation, that quickly, quickly appears, when hearts are pure, devoted and sincerely focused on the ascension of all humans. Her vision reminds us the impossible is merely an illusion, and that our prayers, hopes and dreams are indeed heard by the Bodhisattvas.
I want to share one sliver of my own experience of this great gathering, where, for ten days a year people travel from around the world to dance and pray in one of the oldest ceremonies on the planet. In the midst of this truly extraordinary constant stream of preparation, along with a small team, I took care of eight teenagers so their parents could participate in the collective gathering for several days.
These teenagers are from rather exceptional families (After all, what kind of parents would send their kids off to the hot June desert to stay in tents surrounded by people they barely know)? For the teens, It is shall I say, totally out of whatever box they live in, and believe me the things we introduce them to are not what’s typically happening at home.
As I share this story, please keep in mind that these 8 brave young souls have been immersed in this new community of strangers, working through their many many grumbles, fumbles and resistances. The land is harsh in a way. The sun and wind relentlessly beat, and it perfectly mirrors their heat, dry humor and at times their indifference to whatever everyone is intent upon doing.
As the ceremony pulses and pulses from the day into the night, an invisible deepening creeps in to permeate even their ever distracted, thrashing teen minds. We catch one of their peaks of boredom, when they are itching to leave (but there’s no where to go), no Internet escape, and no parents to bump against. We climb high above on a high mesa overlooking the whole scenario.
Now, as you might imagine this was no ordinary smores-night campfire. You see, the tension, the questions, the CONSTANT bantering around the only subject that truly, utterly and completely captures their attention flares to the surface; sex. Surely, you’ve heard that sex is on a man’s brain every few seconds. Well, for the teen boy multiply that times ten. The girls, although far more demure in their expressions, are thinking about it too.
What’s different about our night on the mesa however More …
Join me THIS afternoon: Facebook Chat
Join me THIS afternoon (Thursday 7/28) at 1 p.m. PDT for a Facebook chat about the upcoming release of my book, “The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka.”
I will be interviewed by the fabulous Laura Orsini, and we’ll be previewing my presentation Friday night as part of Ignite Phoenix After Hours: “Sexual Types: Are You a Pit Bull Man or Antelope Woman?” Although tickets to this sexy event are sold out, you can learn more and perhaps get on a waiting list at the Ignite Phoenix After Hours site: http://www.ignitephoenixafterhours.com/.
NEWS FLASH for Phoenix Folk: There’s all kinds of tickets available on Twitter. Do a search for this: #iaph
This is your chance to bring your questions and chat directly with me for about 45 minutes. Please share this invitation with any of your friends who want access to great information about making your sex life sizzle. Click this link to participate: http://on.fb.me/oKwlFk.
Thanks for the charge and guidance. ”
